Building A Strong Family: How To Be A Real Man At Home

Last updated on February 18th, 2024 at 08:09 am

You have a responsibility to be a strong and all-round reliable foundation for your family, only when you know how to be a real man at home.

Becoming a real man for your family goes beyond providing financial support.

It’s about being present, compassionate, and involved in the lives of those you love.

You must create a safe and supportive environment for your partner and children.

To be a real man at home, you need to focus on being a good communicator, active listener, and fair-minded problem solver.

Also, it doesn’t go without being calm and patient when your loved ones are struggling or upset, and you should be willing to step in and help out with household tasks, child-rearing, and other responsibilities.

In this article, we are going to talk about what you probably know already, or you should know.

It could also be that this article would remind you what your roles are in the home as a real man.

Whichever one, you would be pleased you found this article on how to be a real man at home.

Table of Contents

Definition of a Real Man at Home

A real man at home is someone who loves and respects his family above all else.

He takes responsibility for his actions and provides for his loved ones in every way he can.

He’s a great listener, a comforting presence, and always makes time to connect with those he cares about.

Also, he does not conform to the masculine stereotype of being afraid to ask for help or show vulnerability when necessary, and he is neither fragile in his masculinity that he shies away from emotional vulnerability.

A real man at home knows that being a strong leader means being a loving partner, father, and friend all at the same time.

Basically, a real man at home is someone who puts his family first and works hard to create a happy, safe, and loving environment for everyone to thrive.

You are expected to be a positive role model and instill values like respect, kindness, and empathy in your children.

By prioritizing your relationships and responsibilities at home, you become not only a better man but also a better father, partner, and human being.

A real man showing his children how to be a real man at home

Tips on How to Be a Real Man at Home.

1. Respect and Communication

Being a real man at home goes beyond having physical strength or being the breadwinner.

It is an attitude that reflects the values and principles of a man. One of these values is respect.

Respect forms the foundation of any healthy relationship at home, especially between partners or children.

It is the recognition of the other person’s worth, dignity, and value.

When respect is present, communication becomes easier.

Effective communication is the second characteristic of a man at home.

Communication is crucial in any relationship, and when it is lacking, misunderstandings, and conflicts arise.

Communication involves not just talking but also listening and understanding.

Therefore, a man who wants to know how to be a real man at home should be willing to listen and understand their partner’s/children’s feelings and perspectives before communicating their own.

Related: Becoming a Real and Authentic Man in the Workplace

Respect and communication go hand in hand. When a man respects their partner, they are more likely to communicate effectively.

Communication allows you to express yourself emotionally, and when it’s done well, it can bring you closer to your partner and children.

Real men communicate their emotions; they don’t bottle them up. They are open and willing to share their feelings and thoughts.

This doesn’t make them weak, but rather it shows strength, maturity, and emotional intelligence. It also makes their partner feel heard and appreciated.

Tips to show respect and communicate effectively at home as a real man:

  • Active Listening: Firstly, it’s important to actively listen to what others have to say. This means paying attention to their words, maintaining eye contact, and avoiding interrupting them mid-sentence. By doing so, you show that you value and respect their opinions.
  • Be Clear and Firm in Your Expression: Secondly, find a way to express your own thoughts and opinions clearly with firmness and without resorting to shouting or other aggressive behaviour. Take time to consider what you want to say beforehand and focus on using constructive language to express yourself.
  • Offer Support and Encouragement: Offer support and encouragement to your loved ones on a regular basis. Whether it’s a compliment or a simple “How was your day,” these small gestures can go a long way in fostering positive interactions and building stronger relationships.
  • Be Open to Feedback: Be open to feedback and willing to work on yourself. Nobody’s perfect, and there’s always room for improvement. So, take criticism in stride, learn from your mistakes, and strive to be the best version of yourself that you can be.
  • Use “I” Statements: Rather than blaming or accusing, try to use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs. For instance, instead of saying “You never disposed of the trash,” say “I feel uncomfortable when the trash piles up, can you help me by taking it out sometimes?”
  • Be Open-minded: Be willing to hear and consider different perspectives, even if they don’t align with your own. This will help you build trust and respect in your relationships.
  • Avoid Criticism: Instead of criticizing or attacking your loved ones, try to focus on finding solutions or compromises that work for everyone. Remember, you’re on the same team!

By following these simple tips, you can become a more effective communicator at home and foster stronger, happier relationships with your loved ones.

A real man at home and his curious daughter

2. Responsibility

As a man in your home, there are several attributes you should possess to become a real man.

These attributes are not only beneficial to you but also to your family and society at large. One of these traits is Responsibility.

Responsibility means owning your actions and being accountable for the outcome of those actions.

It also involves being proactive in making decisions that will positively impact yourself and your family.

Being responsible also means providing for your family in terms of basic necessities such as food, shelter, and clothing.

You should also be accountable for the emotional and mental well-being of your family, creating a safe and secure environment for them to thrive.

Tips to be responsible at home as a real man:

  • Set Goals and Work Towards Achieving Them: Setting goals helps you stay focused and committed to achieving your aspirations. These goals may include providing for your family, creating a healthy relationship with your spouse, or improving your health. By setting achievable and realistic goals, you become more responsible for your future and that of your family.
  • Take Ownership of Your Actions: Accepting responsibility for your actions shows that you are a mature and responsible person. It means recognizing the role you play in the outcome of situations, rather than blaming others. Taking ownership of your actions also means apologizing when you have made a mistake and making amends to ensure that the issue is resolved.
  • Be Reliable: Showing up when you say you will, or doing what you said you would do, is a sign of reliability and responsibility. Being reliable means that your family can count on you and that you are dependable and trustworthy.

3. Emotional Intelligence

First, let’s define emotional intelligence. It’s the ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself and others and to use that understanding to manage your own emotions and relationships with them.

Now, you might be thinking, “Why do I need to focus on emotions? Real men don’t show their feelings, right?” Wrong!

Showing emotions isn’t a sign of weakness. In fact, it’s a sign of strength. It takes courage to be vulnerable and open with the people you love.

Emotions can greatly affect family dynamics. They can have both positive and negative impacts on relationships between family members.

Emotions such as love, compassion, and empathy can strengthen family bonds, while negative emotions such as anger, jealousy, and resentment can create conflicts and strain relationships.

One of the ways emotions affect family dynamics is through communication.

Effective communication is crucial in maintaining healthy family relationships, as it allows family members to express their feelings and needs clearly.

Emotions, however, can hinder communication if they are not handled properly.

For instance, if a family member expresses their emotions in an aggressive or disrespectful manner, it can trigger a negative response from other family members and escalate the situation.

Additionally, emotions can affect decision-making within a family. When emotions are running high, it can be difficult to make rational and objective decisions.

Family members may make hasty decisions based on emotions rather than taking the time to assess the situation and consider all factors.

So, how can emotional intelligence help you become a real man at home? Here are a few ways:

  • It Can Improve Communication: When you’re in touch with your emotions, you can express yourself more clearly. You’ll also be better able to understand the emotions of your partner and children, which can lead to deeper, more meaningful conversations.
  • It Can Reduce Conflict: When you’re able to manage your own emotions, you’re less likely to lash out in anger or frustration. This can lead to a more peaceful home environment, where everyone feels heard and respected.
  • It Can Strengthen Relationships: When you’re emotionally intelligent, you’re better equipped to empathize with others and show compassion. This can create stronger bonds with your partner and children, and help them feel more connected to you.

So, how can you improve your emotional intelligence?

Here are a few tips:

  • Practice Mindfulness: Take a few minutes every other day to look in on yourself and your emotions. Notice how you’re feeling without judgment. More on effective practice of mindfulness.
  • Practice Active Listening: When someone is talking to you, really listen to what they’re saying. Try to understand their perspective and emotions.
  • Practice Empathy: Put yourself in someone else’s shoes and try to imagine how they’re feeling.

Remember, emotional intelligence isn’t something you can master overnight. It takes practice and patience.

But by working on it, you can become a more compassionate, understanding, and loving partner and father. And that’s what being a real man at home is all about.

You will find this comprehensive article on emotional intelligence helpful.

4. Role Modeling

A real man should be a father or a father-figure in a child’s life plays a pivotal role in setting the tone for future relationships, self-esteem, and critical decision-making skills.

Children’s first impression of life comes from their family, and as a real man, being a role model for your kids can teach them values such as honesty, respect, courage, resilience, and kindness, among others.

A responsible man can show a child how to be responsible, disciplined, and independent.

Also, teaching them life lessons that they will carry into adulthood should be uppermost on your list.

In addition, children who grow up with nurturing and present men in their lives are less likely to involve themselves in violent or criminal activities, drug addiction, or abuse, they can become depressed, or even suicide attempts.

Therefore, it is essential to ensure that real men and father-figures are present, positive, and active parts of their children’s lives to guide, shape, and mould them into responsible and successful adults.

Tips on How to Be a Role Model to Your Family as a Real Man at Home

Children, especially, learn a lot from observing the behaviour of their fathers.

They look up to you, watch your every move, and learn how to behave in certain situations.

So, if you want to raise respectful, honest, and responsible kids, you need to be a role model for them.

Here are a few tips on how you can be a great role model at home:

  • Lead By Example: As a father, you need to lead your family by example. If you want your kids to be honest, then you need to be honest with them too. If you want them to be kind, then show them what kindness looks like.
  • Take Responsibility: Real men take responsibility for their actions. If you make a mistake, apologize and make things right. Don’t blame others for your mistakes or refuse to admit them.
  • Be Consistent: Being a role model means being consistent in your behavior. Don’t say one thing and do another. Be true to your word and stick to your values.
  • Communicate Well: Communication is key to building strong relationships. Talk to your family members, listen to what they have to say and show genuine interest in their lives.
  • Show Affection: Real men show affection to their loved ones. Hug your kids, kiss your wife, and tell them you love them. Small gestures like these go a long way in building strong bonds.

5. Physical Health

It takes a truly strong and well-rounded person to successfully manage both their personal and professional lives.

While many people tend to focus solely on their work life, it’s important not to neglect one’s home life as well as a real family man.

One of the key ways to become a real force at home is to prioritize your physical health.

Maintaining your physical health is not only crucial for your personal well-being, but it can also have a significant impact on your family life.

Here are a few reasons why taking care of your physical health is the ultimate way to become a real person at home:

  • You’ll Have More Energy to Tackle Daily Tasks: Let’s face it: life is busy and there never seems to be enough hours in the day to get everything done. By prioritizing your physical health, you’ll have more energy to tackle daily tasks, such as cleaning the house, playing with your kids, or even just spending quality time with your significant other.
  • You’ll Be a Positive Role Model for Your Family: By showing your family that you value your physical health, you’ll inspire them to do the same. This can lead to a more active and healthier lifestyle for everyone in the household.
  • You’ll Be More Resilient in Times of Stress: Home life can be stressful, especially if you’re trying to juggle work and family commitments. By maintaining good physical health, you’ll be better equipped to handle stress, which can help you become a more calm and collected presence in the home.

So, how can you prioritize your physical health as a real man at home?

Here are a few simple tips:

  • Make exercise a regular part of your day, even if it’s just a quick walk around the block
  • Eat a well-balanced diet that includes plenty of fruits, vegetables, and protein
  • Get enough sleep each night (at least 7-8 hours)
  • Reduce your alcohol and tobacco intake

Prioritizing your physical health is not an overnight process, but with consistency and dedication, you can make significant improvements.

By doing so, you’ll not only become a healthier and happier person, but you’ll also become a real force at home.

6. Financial Stability

Financial stability at home is crucial for many reasons. Firstly, it enables the man to meet basic needs such as food, shelter, and clothing.

Without financial stability, a man may struggle to maintain his respect and grip at home.

As a real man, it is your duty to strive to make provisions accordingly to have a few other things to deal with.

Here are some reasons why financial stability is crucial within a household:

  • Reduces Stress and Anxiety: Having financial stability gives a sense of security and peace of mind. This reduces stress and anxiety within the household and helps family members to focus on other important things like relationships, health, and well-being.
  • Improves Quality of Life: Financial stability enables families to afford basic amenities like good food, healthcare, education, and decent housing. This in turn improves the overall quality of life for all members within the household.
  • Enables Future Planning: Financial stability allows families to plan for the future and make investments like buying a home or saving for retirement. This ensures that they are prepared for unexpected events and can maintain their standard of living over the long term.
  • Increases Confidence and Independence: Financial stability gives individuals the confidence to make decisions and take risks without worrying about their financial situation. This independence and self-sufficiency can improve one’s outlook on life and contribute to a positive household environment.

Tips on How to Model Good Financial Habits for Your Home as a Real Man

  • Create and Follow a Budget: Start by creating a budget that takes into account all of your income and expenses. This will help you track where your money is going and ensure that you’re living within your means.
  • Save Regularly: It’s important to set aside a portion of your income for savings. Make it a habit of saving a portion of your income every month, even if it’s just a small amount.
  • Use Credit Responsibly: Be mindful of your credit card usage and avoid carrying a balance that you can’t afford to pay off. Only use credit cards for purchases you can afford to pay for in full.
  • Live Below Your Means: It’s easy to get caught up in the desire for material possessions, but it’s important to prioritize your needs over your wants. Make an effort to live below your means by avoiding unnecessary purchases and sticking to your budget.
  • Teach Your Family About Money: Involve your children in discussions about money and teach them basic financial concepts like saving, budgeting, and handling debt. This will help them develop good financial habits early on in life.
  • Plan for the Future: Set financial goals for yourself and your family, such as paying off debt or saving for a down payment on a house. Make a plan to achieve these goals and regularly track your progress.

7. Look Out for Your Parents and Siblings

Always make sure your parents are comfortable according to your means. If they are aged, create time to be with them more often.

Let them have your love and let them know you care about their happiness and wellbeing.

Be all to them which you would want your own children to be to you.

Your brothers and sisters are not exempted. If you are the eldest, they have a lot to learn from you and a real man should not disappoint.

If you are married, you need more attention for your wife and family but you should not abandon your siblings. Everything is not about money and material things.

Checking up on them as often as you can is in good taste. Should death take away your father, you should be prepared to stand in his stead and assume his responsibility to look after your mother and others.

8. Be the Protector of Your Home as a Real Man at Home

“But no one can enter the strong man’s house and plunder his property unless he first binds the strong man, and then he will plunder his house.”

Mark 3:27

The true man is the security officer of his home. He puts up measures to make sure no harm comes to his family.

He should be ready at all times to take the bullet for his family. A real man should not ask his wife to go investigate the sound at the gate or door by midnight.

The man will protect his children from bullies and anyone who tries to inculcate bad behaviours in his kids.

His protection is physical, emotional, and social.

9. Be a Teacher to Your Family

Training needs self-control and dedication. The admonition which is a form of teaching includes verbal correction of bad behaviours and should be regularly done by the father and mother to the children.

To discipline children is a demonstration of love by the father who should be a real man.

When a man leaves his kids to others for basic life teachings, they are at the mercy of whatever those teachers have to offer.

The real man is the first teacher for his kids and a guide to his wife. He teaches his kids how to interact with the outside world, how to handle emotions, and develop confidence.

The man should teach his family how to be resilient, be patient in life, put in the work, and any other teachings they need to navigate life properly.

No matter how little time the man has, he should be able to perform these duties because his teaching as a real man is different from what the wife or outsiders for that matter would offer.

10. Respect Your Partner

There are, of course, misunderstandings in relationships and marriages. But a man of honour would have constructive misunderstandings and will never put down his partner.

There are very toxic women though, a real man ignores her when he is persistently being dragged into brawls unbecoming of a real man.

He does not raise his hands on his wife or partner no matter what. A man whose only way of settling a dispute with his wife is to fight is fragile and has some pending lectures on handling marital disputes.

Women are irrational most time, we know. Handling them requires long patience and good management of relationships.

Talking things over with them at the appropriate time and not presenting yourself as a lord is in good taste.

How to Balance Work and Family as a Real Man at Home

Balancing work and family can be a tough cookie to crack, but don’t worry – it can definitely be done! As a real man, you want to be able to provide for your family while also being present and involved in their lives.

Here are a few tips to help you with that:

  1. Prioritize Your Time: Make a list of things that are most important to you, both at work and at home. Figure out what needs your attention first and focus on one task at a time. This way, you’ll be able to give each area the attention it deserves.
  • Communicate With Your Family: Let your family know when you’ll be busy with work and when you’ll be free to spend time with them. Make it a point to be present and engaged during family time. Put away distractions like your phone or laptop and really engage with your loved ones.
  • Consider Flexible Hours: If your job allows for it, consider working flexible hours so you can spend more time with your family. Maybe you can work from home a few days a week, or maybe you can shift your hours so you can pick up your kids from school.
  • Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to ask for help from your partner, relatives, or friends. Remember, it takes a village to raise a family, and you don’t have to do it all alone.
  • Take Care of Yourself: Remember to take care of yourself so you can be there for your family. Create time for leisure, exercise, relaxation, and hobbies that bring you joy. When you’re happy and healthy, you’ll be able to give your best to your family and your career.

By following these tips, you’ll be well on your way to balancing work and family in a way that works for you.

Remember, it’s not about being perfect, it’s about doing your best each day. Good luck!

Conclusion

Being a real man at home is not about dominating or controlling the people around you.

Rather, it involves a commitment to embracing responsibilities around the house and creating a conducive environment for your family.

It requires an attitude of respect, empathy, and understanding towards your partner and children.

A real man at home understands the value of communication, constantly listens to his family, and tries to resolve conflicts amicably.

He is also willing to lend a helping hand to his partner in taking care of the kids, running errands, and carrying out household chores.

A real man acknowledges that his role at home goes beyond breadwinning and has a positive impact on his family’s emotional and mental well-being.

It is important to cultivate a culture of mutual respect, appreciation, and love in the home to create an environment that fosters the growth of every member.

Being a real man at home takes effort, commitment, and a willingness to learn and grow.

It is an essential element in creating a happy and fulfilling family life.

References:

  1. 5 Ways Men Need to Step Up as Husbands and Fathers
  2. A Real Man Provides for and Supports His Family
  3. What it Takes to be a Family Man
  4. A Good Family Man in Today’s World
pyomerez@gmail.com | Website | + posts

Pyo Merez (PsyD) is a distinguished adolescent and adult psychologist at the forefront of mental health advocacy.

With expertise in cognitive and developmental psychology, focusing on social relationships, cultural contexts, and individual differences, Pyo has dedicated his career to empowering adolescents and adults.

As a sought-after speaker and panelist, Pyo shares invaluable insights on issues affecting young people, contributing to a deeper understanding of mental health and well-being in today's society.